attitude

cheriejacqui · Joined: 18 Jun 2012 Posts: 20 Location: USA - CA

Yeah Im new here, just like everybody was at one time, and I am looking only to chat and make friends, not be a stalker or a perv (which there seems to be no shortage of). Im staying out of any room that says "no noobs" and minding my manners in the rooms i do enter, not being at all forward or offensive, but i have never met so many rude people in my life.

Ive been belittled and insulted for nothing more than standing there, ignored and talked down to by people who think they are somehow better because they have been on this site longer than me. What is with this attitude? Ive been chatting for years in regular chat rooms and though I may be a noob at operating an avatar, Im far from new to chat, and I know how to act.

Im not giving up on finding friendly rooms and people here, its just too bad that so far i have found courtesy and respect to be the exception rather than the rule.

Arezeon · Joined: 06 Jan 2009 Posts: 5000 Location: India

Try to visit rooms that doesn't have mods. The abuse might not stop but at least you're free to speak and act in your own way even if you get insulted by the elitists.

I always enter a room and check whether anyone has the star icon in the avatar menu or not.
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Cappy · Joined: 25 Mar 2007 Posts: 7596 Location: United Kingdom

Don't give up!
There are lots of nice people on here!
Maybe they don't go to public rooms so much.

There's a new public room opened by some friends of mine. The group owner is Jasmyn (she's also a mod here in the forums).
Smoked Mirror Office - imvu:JoinPublicRoom?room_instance_id=8718313-734
You might find some nice (albeit crazy) people in there.
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Emmanuelle · Joined: 02 Nov 2008 Posts: 4462 Location: United Kingdom

I have moderators in my rooms (sometimes more than needed).

And sorry no, they are not there in order to boot anyone at will or out of "fun".

I am quite surprised that anybody would think that abuse is linked to moderation powers in public rooms.

Just my 2 cents.
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Joke · Joined: 28 Jan 2007 Posts: 781 Location: Australia

You'll find that people that are guests on IMVU have a certain reputation to be uneducated and although not fair it seems to be the general concept of things. I respect anyone with a sense of personality and intelligence and it's just so hard to assimilate in to such a discriminating group of people. I wish you luck and you have my best wishes.

lapfox · Joined: 12 Feb 2011 Posts: 953 Location: Netherlands

Emmanuelle · Joined: 02 Nov 2008 Posts: 4462 Location: United Kingdom

Vuse · Joined: 09 Jun 2010 Posts: 929 Location: USA - FL

I like your attitude. Very positive. I'm glad you are not taking it too hard.

I, myself, have been blistered by some of the "more experienced" users even without the "guest" in front of my name. I just take it like a grain of salt but still have my own room for people who fit my personality range. People who I would be friends with in real life if I had met them in person. Sounds shallow but I do not want to be friends with someone who constantly makes me feel awkward or feel like they have control over me (as in most cases). I just look for mature and respectful people who know how to have fun without making wounds and putting salt in it for others.

But back to the subject of the people who don't accept you because of the guest name, they are just being a tribe of twits. There are no real ways to tell what kind of room you're going to be in if you join it (which is why I have my own room). You just have to keep trying until you find one or two that welcome you. I'm sorry you go through it.
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cheriejacqui · Joined: 18 Jun 2012 Posts: 20 Location: USA - CA

Thanks for your thoughtful and supportive replies and good advice! This is a foreign and cliquish culture and I appreciate you helping me understand it. I guess I just need to put on my thick skin before I wade into these rooms and quit being such a crybaby lol. Thanks again.
Cherie

Emmanuelle · Joined: 02 Nov 2008 Posts: 4462 Location: United Kingdom

Rayous · Joined: 01 Nov 2009 Posts: 1423 Location: USA - NV

I know how that feels. Still to this day there are people that like to insult me and be elitist. I just ignore them typically or just smile and tell them thanks. It catches them off guard lots of the times.
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Cappy · Joined: 25 Mar 2007 Posts: 7596 Location: United Kingdom

DianaDeMysterieux · Joined: 26 Jun 2007 Posts: 718 Location: USA - TX

I do understand how the OP feels. From what I've noticed, some of us IMVU vets have become very snobby and feel that we know it all when it comes to IMVU and the fact is we don't.

Instead of writing off the newcomers, we need to welcome them and help them in anyway we can.

Also another problem is that you have newcomers on here who just think that they can do whatever they want, that includes being rude little jerks. More than once I have ran into ill-mannered newcomers that come into my rooms or a friends' room and they end up getting booted because of rude behavior.

Sadly, I think that's a huge part of the reason why newcomers are getting such a hard time on here from those who have been for a while. Because you do have IMVU Vets like me who are willing to speak to newcomers and help them out, but when you come across childish, rude and bratty newcomers who feel as if they can do whatever they want and you can't do or say anything about. It does make one act with caution and sometimes treat them disrespect even though they haven't done anything to warrant being booted.

I made a thread on this very forum that might help you out. It's was something I thought would help out the newcomers. I hope you find it useful.

http://www.imvu.com/catalog/modules.php?op=modload&name=phpbb2&file=viewtopic.php&t=429434

Elainiwen · Joined: 28 Dec 2009 Posts: 5999 Location: Finland

DarlinLila · Joined: 29 Mar 2007 Posts: 6131 Location: USA - MI

I really don't understand why people behave in such ways. I seriously think they get a kick out of it.

I have moderators in my room, doesn't mean we don't allow people to come in and check things out, chat or what not. But because sometimes I'm not there and there are several morons that enjoy going into chat rooms and acting like assholes.

Cherie, and any other person who goes through such immature garbage, my friends and I love to just hang, chat, laugh and have a good time. It's not about belittling anyone. I check profiles of every person that enters whether it's my room or a friend's, and if I notice they're new to imvu, I ask them how they like it, offer tips and sometimes gift.

I've booted maybe three people since I started making rooms, and that was due to insulting another person in the room for no reason, and once for raving the moment he entered (my room description says no raving because it gives me a headache). I trust my mods to be mature and do the right thing when needed. Have never had to worry about them abusing visitors.
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