Playing a character of the opposite gender

CountVladDracula · Joined: 07 Oct 2010 Posts: 8016 Location: USA - NY

A few months ago a mod of an RP room pulled me to the side to tell me that I 'weirded out' the other moderators of their room because they had found out I was a woman playing male characters. It wasn't that I was playing the characters poorly, they just thought it was 'weird' that a woman would play men and so well.

A year before this on IMVU another RPer insisted that I call him on the telephone to prove I was female. Since we had been playing together for some time I trusted him enough to let him hear my voice over skype and he was surprised I was female. He said I understood the male mind a little too well, particularly when I had a male character get jealous of another male's flirting with his love interest. I took this as a compliment.

Years ago someone got upset that I was playing The Vampire Lestat when they found out I was female. It's as if they forget that the first person perspective Vampire Chronicles were all actually written by a woman. The Harry Potter books, The Vampire Chronicles, Frankenstein, all have male heroes, unquestionably male, and yet they are written by women and yet some role players cannot fathom a woman successfully playing a well known male character, even if the character had been created by a woman first.

Once, years ago, I was playing Jareth from Labyrinth and a person showed up in his castle and started to ...do things to his throne. If you have seen Dracula: Dead and loving it than think of what the brides were doing to Renfield's bed. When I had him confused and ask what she was doing she OOC said I did not understand women. When I told her that I was really a woman RPing a man she said 'That explains why you don't understand men.' Umm... I don't think I could win with that one.

So if you play a gender other than your own how well do you do? Do people question it? Do they doubt it when you tell them your real gender or can they tell right away? If you're a man do you find it hard to play a woman or easier? If you're a woman, I ask the same.

I have many characters and yet I only have three female avatars, AngeliqueCollins, EmilyTheCorpse, and Annie from the original Being Human on GhostofaChance. I find male protagonists easier because people are less incline to try to use them only as victims / damsels or targets of romance. I don't know why but I just find male characters easier. Not to mention they have a better selection of clothes in the catalog (they don't all show cleavage).

Also have you ever come across anyone very sexist (male or female) wh badly portrayed the opposite gender based on their bias views against that gender?

H3artlessone · Joined: 22 Jun 2009 Posts: 101 Location: USA - OH

While I don’t RP I do have a male avi account on IMVU that is made after a character of mine that I do write about. When I’m on that account I will respond as a male and as that character. I think of it as acting. The only person I have ever come across that has a problem with this is my bf. It’s kinda funny to me that it weirds him out and he doesn’t realize that his reaction just fuels the next words to come out of my finger tips.
_________________

Astelair

YardanDuran · Joined: 17 Jun 2007 Posts: 3282 Location: USA - LA

I play male characters often. In fact, my male characters are preferred over my female ones, more often than not. I tend to play cocky, arrogant, effeminate males, but I have the occassional "MAN" character that is a bit hard to play at times but fun nevertheless. I generally play a male character with an inspiration from what sort of man I would want. Yes, Yardan IS my dream man... call me sad if you will but I adore guys like him.
_________________

CountVladDracula · Joined: 07 Oct 2010 Posts: 8016 Location: USA - NY

I play all different kinds of men.

Dracula is dark and obsessive but also romanatic and relatively straight.

Harry Dresden (RaggedWizard) is also straight. He's also heroic and chivalrous.

Lestat (LestatTheWolfKiller) is somewhat androgynous and bisexual.

Thomas Raith is flamboyant, eccentric and playful but at the same time he struggles against what he is and he is fiercely protective of those he loves.

MrDavidXanatos is a family man but also a megalomaniac.

I play all different personality types but I just seem to be better at men than women, which is odd because I am a woman.

SiNafay · Joined: 01 Mar 2006 Posts: 7077 Location: USA - CA

I can't pull of playing a man. Not as a main character. I can NPC a guy (bartender, shopkeeper, etc), but you don't need to do much with those.

I guess I just can't 'fit' the character without making it stereotypical, and I know I don't want that as a character.

On paper, some of my females could be males, but it just doesn't fit a male when it comes time to play it.

As for playing with people who play the opposite gender..whatever you have fun with.

I may be surprised to find out you are the other gender, but I guess that just tells you about your play.

----

I have noticed that players that are ..attached..in real life..tend to be more comfortable with characters whose player is a different gender. There is none of the anxiety of expectations. It is just having fun with characters and seeing where they take you.
_________________

Shop Until You Drop - Creator Marketing Co-Op

Vangelor · Joined: 22 Mar 2010 Posts: 110 Location: USA - OH

I generally only play characters of my own gender, but it has never bothered me to see others play either sex. I have known people to react very badly to this, with a mixture of homophobia (because a man playing a woman must be gay? what?), mockery, disgust and bewilderment.

When this issue comes up and it is for me to mediate, I generally point out that roleplaying is all about pretending to be what we aren't, e.g. I am not really a dark elf with magic powers - I am a white guy who lives in Ohio.

Sometimes this settles matters, sometimes it doesn't. But if the dislike for cross-gendered RP moves over into harrassment, I always recommend that be reported promptly to the appropriate authorities.
_________________
Who cannot draw upon three thousand years is living from hand to mouth. - Goethe

MedicalxDeath · Joined: 13 Oct 2010 Posts: 323 Location: USA - FL

I play characters of either gender, although I have to say that my female ones out number my male ones, simply because when I started, for several months before I finally made my first male character, I never played anything but females, then it took me a while to get used to playing them. I honestly don't think I portray male characters badly at all, in fact they are sometimes easier to get into the right mood to play than my female characters. I find playing men easier in some situations, women easier in others. It all depends on what mood I'm in on whether I play a male or a female character.

As for being questioned about it, I don't think so, although I have been asked as to why I wanted to play an ageless male character recently, but that's it.
_________________

Skimmerskir · Joined: 22 Mar 2009 Posts: 512 Location: Sweden

...for a while, then only thing I could play was males - despite being a woman, yes.
I really -tried- to take it the other way, I really -struggled- with making my female characters likeable; but I just couldn't. Everything about them nagged me. They were too weak, they were too brutish, they always whined, they never whined at all; it was a serious issue for me, especially since some of my male friends complained about my dudes being too feminine due to their (almost always) bisexual nature.

And I think I know why.
My first character was a girl. Her name was Anneli. All she did was scream, cry and be the damsel in distress.
My second main female character was named Keira. She was a sincerely overpowered fire mage who could of course talk to wolves and had LOTS and LOTS of emotions. She liked crying too. And swooning over a guy who constantly treated her as a jerk.

Looking back, I just hated them. I still do, but now I can at least laugh about it - but previously? Previously I was just -ashamed- that I had created something so sexist and horrific; swearing that I would never, ever do such an awful thing again.
And naturally: This set the bar far too high.

I wanted my girls to be perfect, because I was tired of all the girls I saw that -weren't-. And sadly, I think this has a lot to do with the way I (and most of us) grew up with literature and media. This is changing now, thank god, but when I think about it - what did I watch when I was a kid?
Sailor Moon: She's a heroine, she can defeat the bad guys, but Usagi always cries and whines. Her main interest is love, and about... nothing else.
Disney: Although many Disney princesses are independent and cool in their own way, they still have that... damsel in distress streak. I count out Pocahontas, but I didn't watch that a whole lot when I was a kid: No, I watched Beauty and the Beast, Cinderella and Sleeping Beauty.
Go figures my first two character were what they were.

It was some weird mix of wanting to be a femininst mixed up with the old dream of being a sweet girl dressed in pink; which, naturally, didn't mix. It took some tabletopping and getting relaxed about my female characters to understand that they CAN and SHOULD be flawed; otherwise, they're just no fun to play.

Still, the ladies are heavily outnumbered by the gentlemen, but I'm hoping to change that as soon as possible.

CountVladDracula · Joined: 07 Oct 2010 Posts: 8016 Location: USA - NY

I think a big problem is there's a stigma to RP female characters. There tend to only be three types.

1. Mary Sues.

2. Damsels in distress.

3. Man hating Amazonian types.

I know there are more diverse female characters but these three types have created a stigma that's unpleasant to many females and what drives people like me to tend to prefer to play males.

Celyng · Joined: 05 Feb 2008 Posts: 3823 Location: USA - CA

ThomasRaith · Joined: 12 May 2008 Posts: 1399 Location: USA - NY

Ordinary males are relatively easy for me. But even though I'm female the only female characters I seem to play with any success are antagonists.
_________________

LadySammi85 · Joined: 13 Jan 2007 Posts: 25 Location: USA - FL

I have played males, simply out of need. Many of the RP circles that I am in for some odd reason are heavily female. We seem to have difficulty in finding male RPers who join because they want to play the story, and instead find many who join because they want to molest our pixels. Often times females playing men are preferred because they come to play the story, and not just try to bed anything with an ample chest. Dont get me wrong, I dont have a problem with a male character being charming and interested in women, that is normal, but that should not be his sole purpose in an RP, and he shouldnt think that every female in the room is there because she is also looking for someone to bed. Play the story, and if romance happens, so be it.

So many of us have created male characters, because all females in a storyline is just not diverse enough, and we know we dont have to worry about your male characters hitting on us every second that we play together.

I obviously am not bothered by the cross gendered playing as long as its done well. I do think personally for ooc purposes, though it should be disclosed. As a bi-sexual female, I have met many of men posing as a woman to try to attract my interest that they felt they may not have gotten as a man. While I'm not on IMVU to find relationships, I still dont appreciate trying to be duped for a less then noble purpose.

ThomasRaith · Joined: 12 May 2008 Posts: 1399 Location: USA - NY

More than twice I've had to OOC break it to a flirting gay / bi guy that I'm really a woman and he'd get weirded out. I had said over and over again on the homepage that this is an RP account based on a fictional character.
_________________

KidCarnival · Joined: 11 Nov 2008 Posts: 1239 Location: Austria

I don't get the fuzz. Most of my buddies have both gender avis; my female avi is hideous but exists... What does it matter? Are there really people going up the walls like that? If my best buddy shows up in a dress, whatever, it's still the same person.
_________________

Derp.

HelenaFrenzy_disabled_696 · Joined: 06 Feb 2011 Posts: 64 Location: USA - FL

I don't understand why someone would be "weirded out" by someone playing a different gender. In a past rp I was a part of, there was a man who played a woman, and you would never guess it, he was amazing. And yes, at one point, "she" (the character) got involved with a male character, and he (the male character) had no issue with knowing it was a man playing the woman. And that was because they were dedicated to their characters.
I find it commendable that people can play another gender, and do it well. I wish I could play a male character, I just don't think I would be any good at it.

So yeah, it should be about the character, not the person behind it. (: